The Struggle for Satisfaction | James Henley

Jan200926

Reflection & Contemplation

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The Struggle for Satisfaction

One of my big personal struggles has always been to juggle future plans with being content and satisfied in the present. From being very young, I’ve always wanted to make dreams and plans way ahead of myself – so it wasn’t surprising to me really that I was a Dreamer on the Myers-Briggs test. And constantly being about two or three steps ahead of myself has proved a great advantage in terms of leadership and long term planning.

But the struggle that this means I’ve always faced is being able to execute my plans, and to deal with it when they ultimately work less than perfectly – which is life. And I’m not suicidal or anything, but this gap in my mind between the present and the future has always left me feeling a bit unsatisfied. It’s not that I’m trying to live up to being more than I can be (although I am) so much as that I’m impatient for the future to come now. I want to skip the hard stuff and get onto to the point where everything has come together.

My personality makes me particularly likely to sense this struggle with dissatisfaction – but I don’t think I’m alone. I think this is also a symptom of my generation (gen Y) as a whole. And the culture around us seems to encourage even more – how many films and romanticised tales are told about people who just dreamed big and got what they dreamed for?

So, for me, I need to be able to constantly re-examine myself to check where my heart is – whether it’s here in the present or gone off on another trip into the future. And to teach myself more and more to look to God for satisfaction rather than my own plans. But it’s a funny paradox that one of the things that I consider so key to my own identity – and one of my strengths – is also possibly a weakness.

Are there any other people – possibly leaders – who also struggle with dreaming too far ahead? How do you try to keep yourself stuck in the present?

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